It's ironic!

I'm in one of my moods again. Woke up feeling depressed, lonely and a little home sick. I know it's funny how I said I'm home sick when I'm supposed to be at 'home' now with my hubby, the very place where I should be. But, I don't know why....I... just get this feeling every now and then, especially when I have too much of 'ME' time. My thoughts will start to wander and all this pessimist notions will start to build up.

When we were miles apart, we'd call each other ever so often and I'd keep telling him that I wanna be with him. Simply cos I feel a bit out of place and intrusive when staying with my parents. And also cos I missed him so much.

But now, when I get the chance to be with him, I feel like going back home....Singapore that is!! He treats me like a queen, kisses me profusely, hugs me bigheartedly and gives me alot of attention (except when Xbox and PC games are concerned).......thus I'm puzzled by this uneasy sensation within me. It's just me and him here...just the 2 of us. Mommy and Daddy are in Melbourne...so that doesn't really count. It's wonderful cos we get to bond alot more...but what is life without family and frens around you.

I do have Hajar in Gladstone....who is obviously many miles away north of Brisbane. Our past attempts to meet have failed and I wonder when we'll ever get to meet. I do have long-distance relatives here but it's just not the same as your immediate family. Megan, my afternoon-chat pal aka neighbour has moved out of her mum's place months back to move in with her boyfriend....so I'm one fren short. One may be a small number.... but over here in a foreign land, that could mean sumthing precious missing in your life.

Hubby doesn't feel this way though. Prolly cos he's a man and doesn't need other people as a companion except for me, his wife. But, being a woman....I need another female companion at least for shopping or empty girl talk. There's only so much things that you can share with a man and at times, you just need another female to understand your feelings etc.

I wonder if it would be any different if we just moved to another housing estate instead of another country/continent altogether. Would this home sick feeling ever surface? Most likely NOT.. Simply cos I can hop on a bus/train/cab to visit whoever I want....parents and cousins alike.....instead of dealing with a 7 hr ++ plane ride every time.

Maybe it's true wat they say....nuthing can ever replace home.